


The Things We Lost In The Fire, Fire, Fire

by AngelWithAStory



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Comfort/Angst, Drabble Collection, Minor Character Death, Pre-Series, Protective Siblings, Siblings, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-08
Updated: 2016-06-08
Packaged: 2018-07-13 21:37:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7138286
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AngelWithAStory/pseuds/AngelWithAStory
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“We can’t stay here, Vex’ahlia.”<br/>“I want to leave too, but where can we go?”<br/>“Back home? I don’t know, maybe we can start our own lives somewhere."</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Things We Lost In The Fire, Fire, Fire

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first critical role thing I've posted since I started watching it about a week and a half ago (I'm on ep 30 so sorry if this ends up being completely incorrect)
> 
> Also, this fic breaks my streak of only posting/writing Rooster Teeth stuff (since dec 2014 whoa) so I'm kind of proud of myself right now :D

_“We can’t stay here, Vex’ahlia.”_

_“I want to leave too, but where can we go?”_

_“Back home? I don’t know, maybe we can start our own lives somewhere. No more cold looks, no more being ignored just because of our Human mother or Elven father. Vex… We can’t stay here.”_

_“I know, brother… I know.”_

_“So what should we do?”_

_“Let’s leave tonight. We’ll pack our bags, slip away in the dead of night. You’re right, Vax. Anywhere’s better than here.”_

_“We’ll need to steal some food as well.”_

_“And some travelling cloaks.”_

_“Some weapons?”_

_“Oh, of course. Do you still have your knives in your room?”_

_“Do you still have your bow?”_

_“Yes. It’s hidden underneath my bed.”_

_“Then we need to hurry before dinner.”_

***

Vax’ildan looked down at his sister, who slept soundly on his shoulder. They’d agreed to take watches while the other slept, but Vax had a good feeling that they were hidden from view. They’d managed to find a large, hollowed out tree just off a worn path in the middle of a forest.

The nearest town was still half a day’s walk away and they were both too exhausted to walk through the night to an inn. Leaves cushioned the ground but the inside of the tree smelled unfortunately like decay and as much as Vax liked nature, rotting leaves and bugs were nowhere near as favourable as a warm inn bed.

Vex’ahlia shuffled slightly in her sleep and finally settled back down against Vax’s shoulder. She _much_ preferred the forest. Even when they lived with the Elven, Vex had favoured a more _huntress_ approach to combat, while Vax had leaned more towards stealthier methods. The dagger hidden in his boot proved that.

The sound of horses crept through the air and piqued Vax’s hearing. He stiffened and forced his breathing to slow until it didn’t even shift a stray strand of hair that had fallen in front of his face. Vax placed a hand under Vex’s head and propped her up enough to slip his arm around her, holding her close as the sound of hooves on crisp leaves grew closer.

“The tracks stop here! Search the area!” A deep voice shouted out. The voice echoed through the trees dangerously.

Vex stirred ever so slightly and peered up at her brother, but Vax just put his finger to his lips in a ‘ _shhhhh_ ’ing gesture and strained his hearing. She opened her mouth to say something but Vax’s hand clamped over her mouth as the sounds paused in line with their hiding place.

“ _Stay quiet._ ” Vax hissed, putting his mouth close to Vex’s ear. Vex nodded and listened intently as Vax pulled his hand away. They held each other close as they heard heavy footsteps, slowly approaching.

A pair of armoured feet moved into view of their hiding place. The armour was, undoubtedly, Elven. Those were their father’s people. Searching the forest for them.

The feet took a step towards the tree. Vax ever so slowly reached down, thanking every deity for the lack of leaves beneath them, plucking two daggers from his boots. He held the handle of one out to his sister and they both clutched them tightly.

Neither of them moved. White knuckled and afraid; they didn’t even dare to breathe. Seconds passed like hours as they waited for the person to leave.

Eventually, the feet turned around and returned the way they came.

“All clear over here!” A voice shouted out, higher than the first one.

“All clear!” A different voice joined in.

“Alright. We keep searching!” The deep voice commanded.

Heavy footfalls retreated to the pathway and the horses made noises of protest. The twins waited with baited breath as the sound of a horse galloping eventually faded. They waited a few more moments before either of them allowed themselves to breathe out a sigh of relief.

Vax looked down at his sister and Vex looked back up at him. They shared an unspoken conversation and Vex sat up properly, leaning against the inside of the hollowed out tree.

“Come on, get some sleep, brother.” She said, patting his shoulder and handing back the dagger. “We’ll carry on once we’re both rested.”

Vax nodded, returning his weapons to their place and settled against his sister’s side. He heard her hum something gently under her breath and Vax recognised it as an old song their mother was sing to them as young children. The familiarity and the nostalgia of the song made something in his chest clench, but it was enough to lull Vax into a brief respite.

***

Vex pulled her hood down as she knocked on the back door of the inn softly. A young boy swung the door open and grinned at her.

“Oh hello, Miss Vex’ahlia.” The young boy said, throwing the door open to let her in. He couldn’t have been more than ten years old and beamed like summer when Vex produced a small bunch of purple and blue flowers. They were fairly common flowers to Vex, even if the name escaped her, but they were pretty.

“Here you go, I promised I’d get you some of the prettiest flowers in the forest.” Vex said, ruffling the boy’s hair when he took the flowers and looked at them in wonder. Vex wondered if he’d ever seen flowers from the forest before. Though, if the stories of the beasts in the forest were true (not that Vex had seen, anyhow) she doubted any of the children had stepped foot in the forest.

“MOTHER! MISS VEX’AHLIA IS HERE!” The boy shouted into the house. He beamed up at Vex before running past her down the street. A woman bustled down the stairs into the room and smiled as well when she saw Vex standing by the open door.

“Where’d the little blighter go this time?” She said, but with as much affection as a mother could put into a single sentence.

“Well he asked me if I could get some flowers from the forest for his friend.” Vex explained, hefting a large pouch off her shoulder and holding it out to the woman.

“ _Oh_ , little Lucinda, is it?” The woman said, fondness in her voice as she took the bag from Vex. “Well, that makes sense. She’s been ill these past few weeks. Probably wanted something nice to cheer her up. You didn’t have to go through all that bother, lass.”

“It was no problem. There was a nice little patch I found on my way back.” Vex said.

“Sit down, love, I’ll make you a hot drink. You must be freezing.” The woman said, placing the bag down on a stool and turning towards a pot coming to a boil on a fire lit stove.

“Only if I can bring a cup up for my brother.” Vex said.

“You can take the whole pot up if you’re serious about what’s in that bag.” The woman said, a small glint in her eye as she poured the content of the pot into two mugs. She carried them over to the table that Vex had sat herself at. “That meat’ll keep us going for two weeks. At least.”

“Well if it keeps a roof over my brother’s and my head then you can have all of it.” Vex reached out for one of the mugs and breathed in the scent. It was sweet and flowery but tasted like berries. Underneath the bittersweet taste, Vex could feel the warmth of some mild alcohol. It was much nicer than anything she’d had in Syngorn.

The woman waved her hand and she took a swig of her own drink.

“For all the trouble you go through in that forest, a room and meal is nothing.” She said, standing back up. “I’ll pour the rest of this into a pot and you can take it up to your brother.”

“Is he back already?” Vex asked, frowning slightly as she held the warm, empty mug in her hands for a moment longer.

“Oh yes. He came back a little while ago. I think he might need this, if I’m honest.” The woman said, holding the pot out to Vex.

“I’ll go check on him.” Vex pulled her sleeves down over her hands and took the pot carefully. “Thank you for the drink.”

“Thank you for the meat. I’ll give your bag a clean and have it brought up to your room in the morning.” The woman said, patting Vex’s head as she headed out the backdoor.

Ever so carefully, Vex walked around to the front of the inn and balanced the pot as she navigated the stairs. She adjusted her grip on the pot and opened the door to their room, letting it swing open.

“Vax, I’ve brought us some… Tea, I think.” Vex said, slightly distracted. Her eyes snapped up to her brother, and she paused. “What are you doing?” Vex asked, stopping dead in the doorway.

The room they were staying in was small with two small beds, in the inn above a tavern in some village they were passing through. (Or that they had meant to pass through but somehow ended up staying at for a long while). It was cosy and, because of a deal Vex had struck up with the owner, it cost barely anything to stay there for months at a time.

Vax sat on the bed closest to the window, a mirror in one hand and a pair of scissors in the other. He dropped the scissors on the bed when his eyes snapped to his sister, looking almost guilty. His hair was wet and Vex could see where he’d tried to cut it himself.

“This isn’t- I promise-” Vax stumbled out, before sagging forwards in defeat. “I got into a fight in town while you were out hunting. This guy shoved me backwards towards a table and there was a _candle_ on the table and my hair got a bit singed on this side.”

Vex’s whole posture softened and she stepped inside, shutting the door with her foot behind her. Carefully, she put the pot down on the low dressing table, then she shrugged off her coat and quiver. Stashing those, Vex poured out some of the content of the pot into a mug and she walked over to her brother’s side.

“At least let me even it out for you.” Vex said kindly, handing her brother the warm drink.

Vax handed her the grip of the scissors and straightened his back, dropping the hand mirror in his lap in favour of holding the mug. A sizeable chunk of hair had been burnt and Vex could only imagine what the fight had been like for this to happen.

Carefully, Vex evened out the damage. He’d lost a good few inches of hair and it hung much higher on his back than it had previously. She did her best and focused all her energy on being careful and precise. When the hair line was even, Vex carefully put the scissors down on the bed and ran her fingers through the hair, doing one last check that all the hair was the same length.

Vax wordlessly held up a circle of elastic and Vex took it from him. She began carefully twisting his hair into a plait that Vex usually twisted her own hair into. They were both quiet as she did so, smoothly twining the locks of hair together and tying it off with the circle of elastic. Vax slowly sipped his way through the drink, his shoulders relaxing ever so slightly as he savoured the taste.

Even when Vex had finished, she just moved so that she sat next to her brother. Silently, Vax held out his hand towards her and Vex let him grip her hand for comfort. It was warm from whatever drink the innkeeper had given them.

His head rested on her shoulder, at a slightly awkward angle because of the height difference between them. Neither of them brought it up.

They sat together until the sky outside darkened. There were few moments when their own sense of youth really caught up with them.

They sat together, all of their nineteen years pressing on them heavily. Too few years to have really lived at all.

“Do you ever think about our mother?” Vax said, his voice hushed in the quiet room.

“More often than I care to admit.” Vex said. Her eyes focused on nothing and the only thing she truly acknowledged was her brother against her side. “I wonder how she is. If she ever married. If she thinks about us as well.”

“Do you ever want to go back?” Vax asked. “Just to see her again, not necessarily to stay.”

“Sometimes.” Vex let the room return to silence for a moment before she spoke again. “Do you think we should?”

“Can’t hurt to just check in with her.” Vax said. His voice betrayed his words and Vex could tell how much this had been on her brother’s mind recently.

“We should get some sleep, brother.” Vex said. “We’ll set out at the end of this week.”

***

Two horses trotted steadily down a forest path. Their riders both had hoods pulled up, obscuring their faces, but they talked playfully amongst themselves.

“Are you _sure_ you know the way?” Vex asked, a smile on her face as she looked over at her brother.

“Of course I know the way, Vex’ahlia. How is it that you _don’t_ know the way?” Vax returned.

“Because we haven’t been down this road in almost ten _years_.” Vex said. “I’m _convinced_ that you’re fucking with me about remembering the way.”

“Ah, it’s really simple, Vex.” Vax said, steering his horse to be slightly closer to his sister. “You have a lot to learn if you want to make it in the world.”

“And why’s that?”

“Because there’s signposts telling me that we’re on the right path.” Vax said, pointing at a low signpost. It was just a short plank of wood with the name of the village carved into it, nailed to a tree maybe two feet off the ground.

“Funny thing is, brother,” Vex said, a sly tone in her voice, “you still need to work on your stealth if you think I can’t see that map under your cloak.”

“You know, I’m surprised you couldn’t see the signs from your unique vantage point, stubby.” Vax teased, fully pulling out the map from his cloak and propping it up on the horse’s neck in front of him.

“I _really_ wish you’d drop the nickname.” Vex said, exasperated at her brother’s continual attempt to lord his height over her. “Two inches is not a lot.”

“Good to know you’re already picky.” Vax quipped before Vex really registered what she said. “Makes my job easier.”

“Oh shut up, Vax.” Vex hunched her shoulders forwards in annoyance and scowled at her brother from underneath her hood. “Are we nearly there then?”

“It should be just around this next turn.” Vax said, folding the map and tucking it into one of the saddlebags. “Why, nervous?”

“You wish.”

They rode in silence for a while, enjoying the scene around them. The last time either of them had travelled down this road was when they were ten years old. They were scared and rejected but still just a little hopeful that things would be better in Syngorn. If only they’d known that they were wrong.

The path was curved to the side and both the twins held their breath instinctively. This was it. The moment they would see their birthplace in almost a decade. They saw the ash before they saw the ruins.

The village they remembered was gone.

Only the dead embers were left.

Vex noticed the people first. A few newly rebuilt houses had been erected further down the path and villagers milled around. She rode her horse closer and Vax followed, eyes darting around the burned down houses, searching for signs of life. Villagers stopped when they saw the half-Elves, staring with a mixture of horror and pity.

_“It’s them.”_

_“The half-bloods.”_

_“What are_ they _doing here?”_

The whispers floated up to their ears and Vex felt her anger flare. She brought her horse to a halt and jumped down. A few of the passerbys ducked their heads and walked on, but Vex grabbed one by the arm: an elderly man who looked at her with sad eyes. She recognised him as one of their mother’s neighbours, and from the look on his face, the man recognised her as well.

“What happened here?” Vex asked. Her throat felt tight and she refused to acknowledge the burning in her eyes. “Where is our mother?”

“I’m sorry.” The old man said, placing his hand on her arm in the only gesture of kindness he had ever given either of them. He glanced at something over Vex’s shoulder and she saw her brother walking up beside her. He looked worried.

“What’s going on?” Vax asked. The old man took his arm from Vex’s grip and placed a hand on both the twin’s shoulders. It was a strange gesture because it was so foreign.

“There was a dragon. This was a few years ago, mind. It was sudden; no one saw it coming. The village was burned down. Your mother didn’t make it.” The old man said. He sounded sombre but the twin’s knew that their mother had never been overly popular since their birth. Maybe something had happened in recent years that changed their minds; or maybe they didn’t like to speak ill of the dead.

“Our mother’s dead?” Vax repeated. He sounded almost broken. Vex refused to admit that she felt her own heart breaking as well.

“I’m sorry.” The old man bowed his head and withdrew his hands. He walked away without another word.

Vex turned around and drew her brother into an embrace. They held each other tightly. Vax’s fingers dug into Vex’s shoulder blades but her hands gripped his cloak just as tightly.

The villagers looked at them as they held each other, but not for too long. They still had things to do and a life to go on with. One or two that seemed to recognise them walked a bit closer. Not speaking, never reaching out to them. Just wanting to see the two half-Elves that they had once sneered at and pulled their children away from on the street.

They held each other for a little while, both grieving silently for one of the few people that had shown them unconditional love and kindness. When they pulled apart, their eyes were damp and their throat hurt from the strain of keeping their sobs in.

“Let’s go, Vax.” Vex said finally, looping her arm through her brothers as they made their way back to the horses. “There’s nothing for us here.”

**Author's Note:**

> if you're interested, I'm [queenmoggy](http://queenmoggy.tumblr.com/) on tumblr if you want to say hi or talk critical role <3


End file.
